Revealing the “Pieces of Amber” — and myself

A lot of people out there probably only really know me from the Internet.  They may have seen pictures of me at parties/attended art happenings I’ve organized, follow my tweets, or somehow share connections with me on social media that neither one of us remember forming.  Some may even call me “Sef" in person without realizing that the online nickname started as an inside joke.  They’ve assembled an understanding of me based on the pieces of me I’ve chosen to reveal — sometimes in total self-aware mockery of the construct that is my public identity (i.e. how "Sef" came about).

We all do it.  We all carry with us these fragments of who we are, the experiences that have shaped us, and the idealized person(s) we want to become.  Our identities remain fluid throughout various public and private exchanges, changing depending on who’s around or what’s expected of us in a particular setting.  But who are we, really?  It’s a question I’ve specifically come to ask for nearly three years now about a former roommate of mine named Amber which, surprisingly, forced me to think long and hard about answering that question as it relates to myself.

In the summer of 2010, Amber abandoned our apartment without warning, leaving all of her belongings behind.  Her abrupt departure threw me into a tailspin.  She walked out on over $1400 in back rent, forcing me to find extra work really quickly to pay her bills.  And then, months later as I was still sorting through her shit, I discovered her diaries — along with so much more about Amber than I’d previously realized.

I came to know Amber when she was 28, but her diaries were written between the ages 20 to 24.  The pages themselves are visual artifacts sculptural in their assembly: Many of the entries are typed, printed, and pasted into a spiral-bound notebook.  They also contain the classic dramatic elements of tragedy and comedy as she represents hubris through a strong face for her imagined audience – and at other times private shame, divulging violent recollections of encounters with partners and relatives both male and female.  In her writing, she even assumes several distinct voices to retell her lived experiences, to the point of seemingly alternating genders as she challenges their respective norms thrust upon her.

imageI basically had to make sense of this person (and why she did what she did to me) through the things she left behind.  I put together the pieces of Amber, and now, in exactly one month from today, I’m inviting audiences to do the same with the opening of my show Pieces of Amber at doris-mae from November 8 through 17.

I’ve created an immersive art experience intended to enable an audience to uncover, identify, and question the many complex identities of Amber through artistic multidisciplinary presentation of the fugue in her diaries as a means to construct their own unique vision of who she is — while asking themselves the same questions they ask of her, and undergoing the same process of voyeurism and discovery I did when I originally uncovered the diaries.  The audience will move through a space once alive and inhabited by Amber, chock full of the discarded scraps and relics of her daily life, providing them with the experience of her person via the traces and objects she has left behind (much as we do when sifting through our own memorabilia and, in a more formal, ritualized sense, when summoning the life of a person in absentia, either due to their death or their departure).  

I’ve assembled a guiding chronology of her diaries, but my artistic intent is to empower the audience to form their own subjective, individual understanding of Amber – and to decide what judgments they, in turn, want to make of her (and, ultimately, her decision to abandon her life and possessions) through her various diary entries ranging from the comedic absurd to the hidden, cursive-filled pages in the back that document her childhood traumas affecting who she is today.  Above all else, her anonymity will always be assured since I plan to never reveal her true identity in public.  My goal is not to shame Amber for her trespasses against me; quite the contrary, this entire creative process has proven that the work is actually more autobiographical to me.  It has forced me to confront my own issues of abandonment, my multicultural identity (Amber is half-black, like my mother), and my will to survive by any means necessary as Amber has continued to do.

I want people to know me as so much more than an Internet avatar who trolls gallery openings and parties across DC.  I can act.  I produce short films and I direct live performances, like the one I’ll be premiering next month.  I am an experimental theatermaker.  I am an emerging artist.

… And I guess I’m also “Sef” at this point, too.

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Watch ALT CTRL, a film I made:

An unassuming Hill staffer named Andrew (Milo Lazarus) has his life changed through meeting the enigmatic Marisol (Zoha Vaezi) — and discovering a secret she shares with her friend Drosef (Josef Palermo) and the hip residents of DC’s Columbia Heights neighborhood.

A short film by Tim West, Jon Patrick, and Mitchell Langley — from executive producer Josef Palermo. Screenplay by Danka Plan.

Original motion picture soundtrack featuring:

♬ SHARK WEEK | http://www.sharkweekmusic.com/

♬ UGLY PURPLE SWEATER | http://www.uglypurplesweater.com/

♬ THE STATE DEPARTMENT | http://thestatedepartment.bandcamp.com/

Source: youtube.com

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I helped make this decision! Thanks to a nomination by my mentor Philippa Hughes, the DC arts commissioner for Ward 1) I was asked by Lionell Thomas, executive director of the DC Commission on the Arts & Humanities, to serve on the DCCAH Final Selection Committee for the Lincoln Theatre as a community representative of Ward 1.  From my perspective as a young arts organizer and someone passionate about supporting local culture, this appointment is one I was honored to accept.

Today, Mayor Vince Gray finally made public the decision we made as a selection panel – and I’m more than proud to share the news.  We spent a very long day interviewing venue operators, and I have to say, I was bowled over by the folks from 9:30 Club.  They demonstrated a commitment to diverse programming reflective of the surrounding neighborhood, in addition to preserving the rich legacy of the historic Lincoln Theatre.  I know Seth and his team will do a fantastic job.  I can’t wait to attend my first show there!

930club:

MAYOR VINCENT C. GRAY ANNOUNCES THE WINNING BID FOR THE HISTORIC LINCOLN THEATRE

(WASHINGTON, D.C.)Mayor Vincent C. Gray is pleased to join with the Deputy Mayor For Planning and Economic Development (DMPED), DC Commission on the Arts and Humanities (DCCAH) and the Department of General Services (DGS) in announcing the selection of I.M.P., owners of the 9:30 Club, as the winning bid to become the new operator for the Historic Lincoln Theatre, beginning September 2013.  The selection of the new operator highlights Mayor Gray’s commitment to a long-term sustainable business plan for the theatre, as well as the city’s efforts to revitalize one of the District of Columbia’s most important and historic cultural landmarks.

Read the full press release.

Source: 930club

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"Will they allow me on the moon if they realize who I am completely?"
David Wojnarowicz reflecting on a dream in his journal, as revealed by author Cynthia Carr in her [amazing] biography of the late artist.
"Don’t believe everything you think."

Yes; this happened. I was on MTV Spring Break: Miami ‘08.

[UPDATE: Embed link broken — click here for the video.]

This video. This band. 

That time when I used to have ridiculously long (and golden) hair.

Photographed by Chris Chen on August 28, 2011, at The Getaway in Columbia Heights; Washington, DC.

Source: Flickr / furcafe

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#realtalk #realtext w/ @thereallizgorman

  • Me:We have awesome lives and should constantly remind each other of that xo 9:26 PM
  • Liz Gorman:Yes sometimes we get distracted. But that is all they are: distractions 9:27 PM

morebitchin:

We love the long and storied history of St. Stephen and the Incarnation Episcopal Church — they gave women the right to vote in parish meetings a full eight years before the U.S. Constitution recognized women’s suffrage. In 1957, their congregation was first to be racially integrated in the District, and the progressive church was an early home to DC’s iconic hardcore punk scene (Fugazi played there in 1987). Alas, now Josef is the first person to be photographed semi-nude* in this hallowed sanctuary.

[*He kept his socks on.]

#YOLO

(And props to photographer Gabriel Mellan.)

Source: morebitchin

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  • i like birthdays — the more you have, the longer you live

Philippa took me to the opening of Edgar Bar + Kitchen at the historic Mayflower Hotel.  Such a fun party!

Source: digital.modernluxury.com

Just got home to a huge package of documents from the DC Commission on the Arts and Humanities — I’ve been asked to serve on their final selection committee to determine the future U Street’s historic Lincoln Theatre. (The nerdy arts organizer in me is beyond excited to start poring over these proposals before our all-day deliberations on Tuesday.)

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→ WHO OWN THIS CITY

#WHO #WHO #WHO #WHO #WHO

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admo tonight behind two bros

  • admobro #1:"how hot is she?
  • admobro #2:"... she Instagrams well"
  • admobro #1:"but like hashtag no filter, right?"
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